Kristian MichailHow good are the people who say they don’t judge others? Perfect angels that have transcended the ugliness of critique. News flash: We are all judgmental cunts. You, me and everyone that’s ever lived. Racist, sexist and as perverse as those we point the finger. You are not special in your judgment and you are not unique for bullshitting yourself into thinking that you do not judge others. We all judge people. People judge us. And we judge ourselves.
It may not look pretty but it’s the primal reality. It’s the slimey knife at the bottom of every dirty sink. Necessary to cook, unpleasant to wash. And whether we like it or not, just facing the facts brings us closer to love. Closer to love? But how can judging something or something bring us closer to love? Well, until we judge someone fully, unabashedly, brazenly, hypocritically, it is not possible for us to feel the full range of who we are. And it is the full range of our disgust that helps reflect who we are back onto ourselves.
Our fears. Our wounds. Our desires. So thanks to judgement, we experience a special kind of torture. One that is both self-denying and self-reflecting. A paradox of hilarious proportions. Ironically, it is only when we feel the agony of judgment does the door to healing opens. Until what we judge is swallowed as who we are, the torture will continue. The torture is the wound being mirrored back onto us. A reflection of what we have not loved fully in ourselves. And it is this kind of honesty that our love can be known.
What if our judgements are the path to love? That without sexism, sex can’t be appreciated. That without racism, tribes can’t be respected. That without disgust, love cannot be known. If we lived without judgment, we would live without a part of ourselves. And love is only possible when every part is loved. Until we are honest about what disgusts us in others, we have no chance of ever loving what disgusts us in ourselves. And if we don’t love ourselves, then we have no chance of fully loving others.
Whoever can heal their wound the fastest, can love life the deepest. Whoever can own that they judge the shit out of everything, gets the keys to loving anything. And if you manage to heal some of your shit, just don’t go around pretending like you no longer judge. Because the one who says he doesn’t judge is the one who hates himself the most. Rant Complete.