Complaints

Prompt: “Excuses and complaints are signs of a dreamless life” — Alan Paton

Context: This guided simulation aims to help you recognize that complaints are often used as a way to avoid looking inward and confronting our own insecurities. By identifying and breaking the cycle of complaining, you can create a new, empowered perspective and unlock the potential for more fulfillment in the world. Essentially, your complaints do more damage than the things you complain about.

Question 1: What identity you have constructed for yourself based off a complaint or critcism you’ve held for a long time? For example, if you frequently look down at people with tattoos, you may have constructed an identity as a “Pure Skin” that limits your ability to connect with life.

Question 2: In what ways is this complaint influencing what you do, have, and be? For example, if you disklike tattoos, what actions do you take (e.g. right people off), what results do you experience (e.g. bitter taste in my mouth), and what way of being do you embody (e.g. hostility) as a result of this complaint?

Question 3: What are you not doing, having and being in this area that is missing? For example, if you complain about people with ink, what actions don’t you take (e.g. ask curious questions), what results don’t you experience (e.g. interesting conversations), and what way of being don’t you embody (e.g. fascination) as a result of this complaint?

Question 4: What possibility would you love to experience instead? What would be more fulfilling than your current complaint? (eg. being stunned by the stories behind each tattoo).

Question 5: Let's journey to a time or location where you fully experience this possibility. Use your words to transport me there by painting a vivid picture of your surroundings and the people around you. For example, if your possibility is being fascinated with the stories behind people’s ink, take me to a moment where this reality is alive.

Question 6: Great stuff. What event or situation would make this possibility a reality at this place? For instance, a person is sharing details about their tattoo that would move anyone to ears.

Question 7: Perfect. Can you describe what action you’ll take in the moment immediately following the realization of this possibility? For instance, your fascination is made real by how moving their story is, and one action that could follow may be a honest response of how you’ve historically righten people off.